Thursday, November 18, 2010

How to Invade Your Neighboring Country in 12 Steps

Items you'll need:
  • Troops (3 - 30 soldiers), weapons optional
  • Your own country's flag
  • Wi-Fi capable device
  • GPS device
  • CD player
  • CD with at least one track of triumphant music
  • Cellphone


  1. Begin marching troops towards border of the country you wish to invade.
  2. Use Wi-Fi capable device to access the internet.
  3. Use your favourite search engine mapping service to locate an area within the border of target country which has flagpole with that country's flag flying on it.
  4. Commence actual invasion into that area.
  5. Once you have located flagpole, lower flag using soldiers. For added effect, you may have them grumble with disgust at the inferior design and representation of the lowered flag.
  6. Place your own country's flag where inferior flag was previously, and raise to the top. Again, for added effect, you may have soldiers cheer the superiority of your flag as it is raised.
  7. Turn on CD player.
  8. Insert CD with triumphant music.
  9. Have soldiers sing and dance. (If you have weapons, it is not recommended that you fire them into the air, contrary to popular misapplication of firearms during times of military triumph.)
  10. While soldiers are still triumphing, use cellphone to call your government to inform them of the invasion and to invite them to the celebration. At this time, you will be informed that you weren't supposed to invade the target country.
  11. Look at Wi-Fi device, compare to GPS device, and declare the search engine previously used to locate area unreliable.
  12. Replace target country's inferior flag on flagpole and return to country of origin.

Congratulations! You have just invaded your neighboring country!


AdamS said...


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Bria said...

Positively hilarious!

Mike said...


Son III said...


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